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Saturday, April 20, 2013

How Did I Get Here

I saw a post yesterday on facebook it was a friend commenting on another persons photo a person like me severely obese... and it said something along the lines of how can someone let themselves get so big, surely there is some stopping point of enough is enough. 

 Let me explain being fat to you from my perspective... I think it's close to any lifestyle that may be negative - when you compare it to gambling, drugs, alcohol, sex addicts - most people think that they have this under control and can stop @ anytime the truth is they can't.... not alone - and even so that perfect plan is still a struggle... and there are falls whether it be losses, stress, pain, anger, celebrations, boredom whatever that may be a trigger.. and one may turn to those things for a temporary fix/pacification... and then when it's met and we have a chance to look @ ourselves - the guilt sets in and a few things happen from there .... we convince ourselves that we are fine we have this or that for an excuse for the way we are and embrace it not willingly but enough to accept it as what it is.  We build walls up around us, limit the people we allow to touch our lives and pretend to enjoy where we are at... it's much easier then failing again @ trying to succeed. We even believe that our situation isn't that bad - I remember about 15 yrs ago seeing a woman coming out of a Ryans Steak House Buffet .... her tummy hung to her knees... I thought to myself I would never let myself get like that... as I went in and ate to my delight ... out of tasty foods ... not from hunger - and I ate and ate. I haven't been eating like that for over 10 years as it would make me sick... however it did lead to where I am @ today so I packed on all this weight over time and it just sat - I made southern home cooked meals that were DELICIOUS but were definitely not something you would be eating if you were trying to lose weight, or in general watch your health etc.... 

So I had my family - they loved me and I convinced myself that's all I needed in life, however it's incredible how well we can deceive ourselves... I omitted myself from things like visiting my kids @ lunch ... because I didn't want their friends picking on them with fat jokes about their mother, all of the photo's over the years... are of the kids and dad my excuse was - well I was the one who was always taking the picture... truth is .. I didn't want to see myself in those photos... :( who was I hurting here? Amusement parks - I couldn't enjoy... I couldn't ride anything with my kids I still took them but as an observer... not a participant - and then the water park this past summer I sat in the kiddie pool with our adopted 2 yr old while our teen daughters and foster kids went on all the slides, they would ask me to go... but the steps to get to the top I knew would be excruciating on my knees and ankles.... not to mention being out of breath - and most of the slides I exceeded the weight limit - thank God I have not had to ride on an airplane because I already know... that would be another slap that would sting silently inside.

I don't know why every other fat person is fat... I don't know why they do not do something about it - I can only answer for myself - and that is I never found something that worked consistently... something that fit me - not only am I losing weight but have been inspired to help others reach their potential for health whether it be weight loss, building lean muscle, gaining energy and detoxing along the way... if you came across this, maybe you too have had the similar experience or moment where you just want to... but it's so hard for one reason or another - please join my facebook group and we can talk about your goals and how to get there!! https://www.facebook.com/groups/442381235839667/ 

Just to show you how successful Isagenix has worked for me here are my latest results from my 9th week!

I have a long way to go... but I am okay with that everyday my body feels stronger and healthier, my hair strangely is returning to it's natural blonde color ... without chemicals - never thought that was possible - my skin is vibrant and so soft- no more mid-day power naps with the toddlers.... I can work a whole day and not dream about laying down... when I sleep - I am ASLEEP! I have energy to keep up with all my children - right now that's 6 but can be as many as ten @ times. The best part about isagenix is that it's 100% guaranteed or your money back!

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